7 communication skills that will help you stop meeting hijacks
Posted on February 16, 2011 by Baxter Dickson
In a recent post on tips to make meetings more productive, one topic generated a lot of conversation here at VoicePro: how to manage disruptive people. One closed mind, one naysayer, one time hog can hijack your meeting – and your results. What can you do to rescue control and keep the process moving forward? Here are some ideas that can make a difference.
Don’t delay. Take immediate action.
Oftentimes, disruptive people count on the good manners of others to give them free reign. Respectfully take a stand – early and often. Suggest the person let others speak
Reroute Detour Thinkers.
Whether the person means well or is purposely trying to derail a discussion, someone who leads your meeting into irrelevant topics or minor details is slowing your progress. Help everyone return to the key issue with a firm but kind reminder. Sometimes having a “parking lot” where you can write down such topics to be considered in another session can help thinkers stay focused.
Getting Naysayers to Yes.
Stalled by a person who’s already decided an idea won’t work or a situation is beyond repair – and is intent on saying so over and over again? You need to break the cycle and force an open mind. After the first few hostile comments, gently close the door. “You have some valid concerns. Let’s see if anyone at the table has solutions or a work-around.”
Stop the Idea Mugger’s sneak attack.
The person who whispers a nasty side-comment or offers a snide laugh is a mugger making a sneak attack on the idea – and the team. Use the same tactic your fourth grade school teacher did: “Do you have something you want to share with the group?” Chances are the answer is “no”, and generally followed by silence.
Unplug the Squawk Box.
Some people think a solution can be reached without their wisdom. Others see a meeting as a place to show off for the boss. Either way, they just keep talking. As soon as there’s a pause in the action, step in with a thank-you and then specifically ask another person to weigh in. If you’ve got a particularly tough customer, consider starting the meeting with these ground rules, “First, we’ll go around the table and each person has 3 minutes to express a view.”
Block the Hostile Takeover.
If the meeting collapses into bickering factions, acknowledge that emotions are running high and urge everyone to take a deep breath and return to the topic. Some experts suggest a process I’ve heard from marriage counselors. Each person must restate their opponent’s viewpoint before offering his or her own. This helps all participants to really listen to what is being said, which is the beginning of progress. Another strategy is to adjourn the meeting, have participants write up their argument and then share them with the team. When viewpoints are in black and white, it may be easier to “get on the same page.”
Bean the Brainstorm Busters.
Brainstorming can be one of the most powerful exercises for seeking solutions. But you’ve heard the phrase, “Nothing is more fragile than a new idea.” One negative person can kill an idea before it’s fully formed. Worse yet, the cynic can shut down the whole group. Bring a few of those soft spongy balls to the meeting and playfully toss them at the offender. The good-natured maneuver stops the negativity and creates a safe environment for “crazy ideas” that just might work!
So that’s how you get the best out of meetings – by controlling the worst offenses. Quickly. Assertively. And professionally. Want to know more about the skills that can help you develop stronger teams? Find out about the VoicePro workshop Speak! Present! Influence!®
